Thursday, August 28, 2008

City and Colour

I'm working at a magazine right now, been out in good 'ol Tejas for a little over three weeks now, and it is such a blessing. I cannot even believe how wonderfully the Lord orchestrated so many things that I never could have imagined in the last six months. 

I dropped out of college to pursue a different calling. Trouble is, you ask me what it was and I'd have diddly squat to tell you. The year kind of went like this: 

Semester #1: Do good in English. Stress your way through elementary level biology and mathematics with everyone's telling you you're doing fine when you're convince you're not, and then get an A and feel stupid for reasons other than academia. End up 3.76 GPA. You are a phenomenal student with high potential for success.

Semester #2: Absolutely, positively... SUCK at statistics, take your first test, immediately drop the class right afterwards, never even attempt to discover what sort of negative grade you received on the exam. Sit in English 102 and read about how Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde somehow became a more viable source for study on the human condition than Paul's timeless, scriptural groaning of hating the sin that acts despite his desire for righteousness. Look out the window. Start shaking because you know that once you leave you will not be back, and somewhere, at some point in time, someone told you that college is actually a wise decision, and the opposite is not wise. 

Do the opposite. Approximately, eh, two weeks into spring. 

For as much as I've laughed out loud while writing this, I do not count myself a complete idiot. Dropping out of college is, perhaps, not an especially wise notion when considering... um, life. However, after timeless prayer and seeking the Lord's counsel, I can say that the decision was, in the end, more of the Lord's idea, perhaps, than mine, and that he was calling me to other things... things that I am still discovering. 

All that to say is that somehow, not four months later, I got an acceptance email from Mr. DVP at HM Mag and now I'm here in Texas. God only knows what it took for me to trust him. Irritatingly enough, I seem to have developed some sort of anxiety issue where I absolutely flip out about things - and all I can say is that there are a few of you out there (you know who you are) that have prayed for me, interceded on my behalf, given me words of encouragement and, to some degree, prophesied aspects of my path throughout my struggle to believe - and to you I am indebted, and I can't stress my appreciation for the beauty and inspiration and insight you've painted onto my canvas, and know that I pray and thank God for you every day. 

I guess this will be my official blog thing for now. For those of you that want to check out the poetry - I'd love any feedback. Hopefully I'll have the discipline to daily keep whoever finds their way here updated with whatever random info my head conjures up. 

I love you, whoever you may be, but Jesus loves you more. 

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