So I have a couple things that I have to clear up, because if I don’t, even though they may be rather awkward in light of circumstances, then everyone else is going to continue to speak for me, and I am so frustrated that people are continually putting words in my mouth. Locally, where I live, there has been gossip and rumors going around about things that have gone on and things that I may or may not have said, and I want to clear them up.
The other day, I met a friend of mine who told me that I don’t like the band Poema. He told me that I don’t like someone else. First of all, that’s false. Second of all, I’m not saying that it’s false because I am going to tour with them – I’m saying it’s false because it’s false. I like Poema. I literally listen to their songs every day. Shealeen and El are friends of mine, and we have always gotten along great, and I’m excited to tour with them, and I’m excited about what the Lord has provided for them by getting to sign to Tooth & Nail and get their name out there. Even if I didn’t like them, who would I be to say what should or shouldn’t happen if it’s already happened and the Lord is planning on using them for his glory? I am no one.
Secondly, there has been a lot of talk about trouble between myself and Veil Arms. I will not deny that we have had our differences, and I will not deny that I have wrongfully been the source of gossip that should’ve been kept private about our relationship. This was sin on my part, and I will own up to it, and for the places that I sparked the flame, I will be the first to apologize to anyone and everyone that I may have negatively affected – burnt, even – by the fire in the process. The looseness in my lips was not edifying to Christ. But I will also say that VA and I have reconciled our relationship, are very good friends, and all has been forgiven and forgotten. I support what they are doing, because Christ has called them to their ministry, and they are following that call obediently. If you don’t know the details of the bumps along the way, it doesn’t matter, because it's in the past, and it is none of your business.
I could name numerous other things that I hear from here, there and everywhere about me or about someone else or about someone else or about someone else... And I keep on hearing about these lies going around as truths. And maybe it’s gossip in the form of a prayer request, and maybe it’s just straight “he said, she said” when the fact of the matter is that nobody knows what anybody’s said because everything is a skewed misconception of what it once was.
Regardless, I’m not posting this to ruffle anyone’s feathers. I’m posting this because I want to apologize for my part, and I have no idea who I need to address or apologize to in person anymore because random people that I don’t even know have been talking about all this stuff, and it’s ridiculous. One of the things that Shawn (the Veil Arms dude) told me that really humbled me is that we’re called to build one another up and grow in Christ and in community and not to be divisive. This rings loud and clear to me because that same spirit of division nearly ruined our friendship because of the words of another person, and none of the gossip was based off of any truth whatsoever. I have been a very divisive person. I am sorry – I am doing everything within my power to change that. If some of you read this, maybe know me a little bit better than others, and feel that I am being hypocritical – I probably don’t blame you – but I beg of you to have mercy on me, because I am realizing where I need to fix issues within myself as well, and I know that it takes time. All I am saying is that I am frustrated with the gossip – yours and mine.
One of the major things that the Lord taught me through my time with White Collar Sideshow last month, and has continued to instill in me through my own prayer and seeking to follow him is that we are all one body, and that we may not always all agree with one another, and we may not always all appeal to one another, and at other times, we might just straight up annoy one another, but for those of us that claim to be Christ followers, we are all on the same team, seeking the same goal, and in it for the same purposes, and it’s unacceptable to keep on screwing each other up.
“Does anyone want to live a life that is long and prosperous? Then keep your tongue from speaking evil and your lips from telling lies!” – Psalm 34:12-13
So, my friends, I am so, so sorry for the lies that I have told, for the sins that I have committed, for the gossip that I have spread. This is certainly a lesson for me, as well. Sometimes people tell me that the best way to learn and seek conviction for yourself is to try to teach it to others. This has definitely been one of those circumstances for me. Please accept my apology as sincere.
And if it is applicable, please allow it to permeate your heart as well. I am apologetic, and I'm also so incredibly frustrated with this behind-your-back nonsense that keeps happening and happening and happening and happening. Please at least try to be respectful of one another, and I will do the same. None of us are perfect, and all of us know it, and not every single person needs to know every single detail of every single little thing, because it is so damaging, and it's ruining a lot of things, and doesn't show the characteristics of Christ that we are to be recognized by... love, compassion, etc...
Love you guys. See you on tour.